We are used to seeing them at some stage of their life cycle, most of us remember watching them grow as tadpoles in our classrooms, and they are a common part of our ecosystem; but how much do you really know about these diverse and amazing creatures? Here are fifteen of our favourite frog facts … Read more
parenting
Parenting moments gone by – overcoming the denial
The other night I was lying with my youngest son at bed time, chatting about whatever came into his head at any random moment.
“Mammy, I’m going to big school now, its time for you to have another baby!”
Ouch!
“Really?”
“Yes, in fact I want two more babies!”
No pressure then!
The fingers came out and he started to count…
“Yes, I want two more babies, then there will be five children!”
“Five children and two adults so we would be a family of…”
A bit more counting…
“Seven! We would be a family of seven. that’s what I want!”
I was impressed with his mathematical abilities… but less so with his sibling generating demands!
To be honest the conversation made me a little sad. In theory I would love to oblige him but in reality I know my baby making days are over. I know that stage of my life has passed, but, in an act of sheer denial, I am clinging to my four year old “baby” with everything I have got. He, in response, is defiantly growing up before my eyes.
He sees what his older siblings are doing and he rushes to match them. I look on with pride and admiration and while I delight in all his achievements I am painfully aware that we are saying goodbye to another stage of life with children. The pride is mixed with a pang of longing for what will be no more. I am afraid to look back, to dwell on any of those baby moments because I think I will feel the loss too greatly.
When I read this wonderful post on The Busy Mama blog I knew it was time to end my blatant denial and face the truth. I nodded in recognition to all the points that Helen made as she recounted her tales of parenting moments gone by. I felt like many of those words could be mine. As the blog post was an invitation to all to participate and share too, I knew that by joining in the linky I would be forced to look back and acknowledge that my baby days are over – a therapeutic way to overcome the denial within.
I have been blessed with three wonderful children. Each one a unique character, each so different but so complimentary to the other. There are so many little things that I miss but here is just one that is so obvious to me at the moment…. my two older children are correcting their brother in his misuse and mispronunciation of certain words. They do it kindly and I know that he must learn but I wait quietly in the background, wanting to tell them to stop. I love all these little errors, I find them so cute and unique and I want them to last forever. But I know they can’t.
So this is what I will miss…
… misappear (for disappear)… a lot of things “misappear” with the little mischief maker around!
incept (for except)… he loves using this word… and I love hearing it!
turch (for church)… I smiled when his brother corrected him on this and he said “some people just say things differently”!!
meleeeze (for please)… it is very hard to say no to a meleeze, especially when there is a pair of big blue eyes and a cheeky grin behind it!
“if magine if” (for “imagine if”)… he says this a lot!
Dee-dee (for Culann) … this was his first word, his name for his older brother; I am not surprised he spoke his name first, it was a beautiful reward for such a loving, devoted brother, who fell in love with him the moment he first set eyes on him; this name lasted years, but is long gone now; it will always stay in the momory of his loving and devoted brother though!
“instructable” (for indestructible)… which is what most things need to be to withstand the “enthusiasm” of the young boy who uses it!
“I love you mammy!”…. no corrections to make there, I just hope he always says it!
I think I am ready now to read all the other posts in the linky, with a box of tissues beside me of course. I am beginning to realise that it is okay to remember but it is also wonderful to celebrate how much my baby has achieved, how well he is growing and how mush delight he gets as he reaches each new goal. I will accept that life with him in my future will be as wonderful as it has been with him in my past, and deep down, in some small way, he will always be my baby!
Ten things that parenting has taught me
There is always plenty of wisdom to be found over on the Learner Mama blog and this week Lucy has shared ten random facts she has learner in Motherhood. I immediately started composing my own list in my head … and as it is a linky I get to share them too!
1. When up against the superior knowledge of a four year old… just accept that you are wrong and they are right. It does not matter how many degrees you may have in the subject… YOU ARE WRONG… accept it!
2. It seems there really is an infinite number of characters in the world, just keep having children if you don’t believe me and you will marvel at how different each child is!
3. Bed time guilt… watching the face of your beautiful sleeping child will fill you with guilt and remorse for being so frustrated and impatient during the process of trying to get them asleep in the first place.
4. However if your sleeping beauties wake in the night all guilt is forgotten and you immediately revert back to the states of frustration and impatience!
5. There is nothing sweeter than a pair of little arms wrapped around your neck in an “I love you Mommy” hug.
6. No matter how hard it might be to understand most of your toddlers words, if they decide to use a “bad” word it will come out clear as a bell, especially if in a public place.
7. It is virtually impossible to suppress a laugh when your child does use a “bad” word for the first time.
8. Throw away the parenting books and don’t ask every parent you meet for advice… remember you have millions of years of evolution on your side… no one really knows your baby as well as you do, so just relax and trust your instincts and you will know what is right! (It took me A LONG time to realise that one!!)
9. All previous eight point can be disregarded as I have learned that every thing I think I have learned since becoming a mother gets disproven by my children, eventually! They like to keep me on my toes so the rules are only the rules until someone decides to change them!
10. The capacity of your heart to love someone completely and unconditionally is infinite. There is no science to explain this one but I have learned it to be true every time I have looked into the face of each of my children for the very first time.
They are just my ten random things but it you want to find out what other people have shared, check out the linky over at Learner Mama (just click on the image below). It makes for great reading, there are plenty of points you will agree with and some that will surprise and amuse…. and if you want to share your own ten points then just join right in!